hard truths of the early 30s

With eight weeks left in my early* 30s, it feels like a good time to reflect on the past ~3 years.

  1. You’ll break your 30s into three-year chunks because it makes you feel life you can leave parts of the decade behind so you can do better when the next three years come.
  2. You’ll accomplish some things. Like finally finishing that degree. Or buying a home.
    1. You might even be the only gal you know who bought that home on her own.
  3. Anxiety is real. It can be vicious and it is real.
    1. For me, it feel like a giant constrictor is squeezing the life out of me. Everything that goes with that, from the hot/cold sweats, the GI upset, the difficulty breathing, and the pounding head, I get it.
    2. It messes with your sense of accomplishment. You can (quite literally) buy a home and finish a degree, but anxiety will tell you it’s not enough.
    3. It messes with your chemistry. You always feel like you’re on shaky ground and your saturation point for all of the things is drastically reduced.
  4. Heartbreak sucks. But being disappointed in yourself sucks more.
    1. You’ve learned what’s not worth sticking around for.
    2. You’ve learned what’s not acceptable.
    3. You’ve learned what you’ll tolerate and what your hard standards are.
      1. Sometimes, you’ll end up having those standards pushed against because you’re not willing to put your foot down over the acceptable and tolerable. But you’ll learn from this, too.
  5. The cats (mostly just Henry, if we’re being honest) are just preparing you for motherhood one day.
    1. When they are difficult, they are just testing you.
    2. When they love you with their little ridiculous faces, you’ll forget about how they were testing you.
  6. Netflix has a really strong siren song. You’re maybe a little bit weak on this one.
    1. You’ll wish it was the gym with that siren call, but you’ll also learn …
  7. That it doesn’t hurt the day after, but two days after. And more intensely.
    1. Age tricks you into thinking that you can do it! Your body disagrees a little bit 48 hours later. But you inherently know that if you kept up with the being active, the recovery would be so, so much easier.
    2. You’re willing to admit you don’t like putting in the work and that you long for the days of ballet.
  8. You’re going to lose people. And that sucks. And it will make you question your life a little bit, but you’ll recognize that you’re in a good place and that the little bit of darkness that you feel from time to time will pass.
  9. But most importantly, you’ll question “best before dates” not because you’re a risk taker, but because you’ll uncover a strong need to convince yourself you don’t have a best before date. Now excuse me while I make a tray of blueberry-rhubarb oatmeal muffin bread.

 

Post-script: The muffin bread is delicious. And so far, not poison.

 

* The early 30s constitute the years 31-33, mid 30s the years 34-36, late 30s the years 37-39, because when you’re 30 you’re 30 and when you hit 40, well, that’s a new decade.

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